These are documented at this website: SendMoneyToThailand.com

If you go up to a man, any man, on the street, give him your map, and tell him that you are lost and you want to go to the National Museum, he will take your map, unfold it, and stare at it for three seconds. He will then stab his finger at the map and say, “We’re here right now.” Then he will point at the museum, which is clearly marked, and say, “You want to go there.” Then he will trace your route along the map, and give you precise instructions: “Go down this street three blocks, make a right, go two more streets, turn left, and it will be right in front of you.”

If you go up to a woman, and try to give her your map, most won’t take it because they know they can’t read it. But if you insist, she will gingerly unfold it, hold it at arm’s length, stare at it, rotate it 90 degrees, turn herself so she’s facing the road, rotate the map again, and generally try to figure out how to align the map with the road. Naturally, the printing will be upside down. Eventually, she will say something like, “I can’t tell from this stupid map; it’s that way” and point in the direction of the museum.

The reason this happens is not that women can’t read maps; it’s that women can’t read maps designed by men.

Men are precise, logical animals. They know precisely where they are in space at all times. As they walk along a street, they watch the house numbers, they absorb the names of the cross streets through their pores. They know, at any instant, exactly how far they have come from a known, fixed location, like that main intersection back there.

Women, on the other hand, also know where they are, but not precisely. They know they are somewhere near the cathedral, and that the market is over that way a little bit. They know that if they walk in that direction for a few minutes, and then head towards the river, they will come to an antique shop they visited three years ago.

I am a programmer, and quite familiar with these two methods of locating things: the first is called “absolute addressing”, and the second “relative addressing”. They’re both right, they both get you to where you want to go, but they use different techniques.

The reason a woman can’t read a map is that maps are designed by men to give them the spatial references they need to navigate. A map is no good to a man unless it shows every cross street, all the railway lines, as well as significant things like towers, parks, and hills. Ideally, a map should show house numbers and the direction of one-way streets.

To a woman, this is all confusing detail, which makes the map a chore to read.

This was brought home to me a few years ago, when my wife and I were in Chiang Mai, a town in Northern Thailand. We were in a tourist shop, looking at maps, when my wife pulled out Nancy Chandler’s Map of Chiang Mai. “Let’s buy this one,” she said. She was obviously attracted by the colourful exterior; all the other maps were drab in comparison.

Outside on the street, she opened up the map and held it in front of her. I looked over her shoulder. The first thing I noticed is that most of the streets were not marked; while the main streets were all there, none of the little side streets were shown at all. There was just a lot of empty space, coloured beige.

“This map is no good,” I said, “It has nothing on it.”

“Hold the map,” she said.

I did, and she stabbed her finger at the map.

“We’re right here,” she said.

I looked closer, and she was pointing just to the right of the street on which we were standing.

“How do you know we’re at that spot?” I asked.

She lifted her finger. The tourist store we had just exited was marked on the map, and had been under her finger.

“This is a great map,” she said.

Nancy Chandler’s Map of Chiang Mai is designed by a woman for women. For men, it’s next to useless; for women, it’s priceless.

About the Author:

Douglas Anderson is the author of Speak Easy Thai and the web master of Learn Thai Faster.

But I saw de dog de firs’ time, his name “Gatee” (coconut milk). I don’t like it because smell very bad. I don’t like it. He boom, boom, boom, (bark) allatime. He de pooden dog. White hair.

After I spend time with him, two or tree day, yes, I like him because he very samaht. When he hungly, he scratch me on my leg. When I go ou’, he wan’ follow me allatime. I said, “Cannot, I don’ want you go ou’ wit me.”

When I come back, he very happy, he run roun’, he boom, boom, boom, and he jump up and down.

Before, I not wan’ spend money for dog, but I spend money on dog shampoo, soap, flea powder for him. I take a shower for him, one time per day. He lie de water. He stand under de tap while I wash him. He really lie it.

I buy towel for de dog, too.

Before I don’t lie it, every dog I don’ lie. I say is nagiad (ugly).

When I give food for him, I put steam rie and steam dry fit, make all togedder and give for him, but he don’ eat, he don’ lie. He push away.

I say, “Gatee! Why you do lie dat, I don’ lie!”

I give him milk and chip. Anudder time I buy pork and beef an’ I make stirfry with rie and he eat. But not spicy. I make beef soup and he lie dat.

[Note: You can kill your dog by feeding it human food. See YouTube video below.]

“I buy baby chicken in market five baht. She go, ‘cheep cheep cheep’ allatime. She follow me roun’. She think I am her mudder.

“Everywhere I go, she run behine me, go ‘cheep cheep cheep’ allatime.

“At night, I go in house, leave baby chicken outsigh.

“In morning, I come out, she run roun’, go ‘cheep cheep cheep’, follow me everywhere. Very cute, Doug. I very happy. ‘Cheep cheep cheep’ all day.

“Next day, I working, very happy hearing ‘cheep cheep cheep’. Suddenly, I no hear ‘cheep’. I turn roun’, see big sanake. Very big sanake, more than two meter. Sanake eat baby chicken. I freeze, Doug, stand like …, not know English word.”

“Statue?” I asked.

“Yes, freeze like statue. I stand like that long time. Then sanake move, I move, too, find big satick, hit sanake many time on head. Many time, Doug, I hit sanake and he die.

“I sit down, I cry, Doug, I cry long time, baby chicken dead. Why she die so young? I take satick, pick up sanake, throw in klong, let fish eat. Bad sanake.”

At this point, she was crying heavily, but being the insensitive lout I am, I really wanted to ask about karma. I knew she was a Buddhist, it would have been interesting to find out what she thought about the snake’s karma, the chick’s karma, and her karma, but I refrained. Instead I hugged her until she stopped crying.

“Did you buy another chick?” I asked when she stopped crying.

“No, Doug, I have very bad luck all year, not wan’ kill anudder baby. But cannot stay on my farm, too serious (depressed), so I come back Bangkok.”

http://www.thai-culture-publishing.com/Forum/

I have been working on Speak Easy Thai and MLD Web Update, and will be uploading new versions of these shortly. The new MLD Web Update supports the Texas server, and does so without using Microsoft’s crappy Internet subroutines which were introduced in IE4. This version of Web Update replaces those subroutines with lower-level, and IE-independent, Windows Sockets subroutines.

BTW, IE7 and IE8 don’t use those IE4 subroutines either. And on my computers, IE8 has black areas in the menu area of the browser window, proof that Microsoft has once again released software without fully testing it. The black areas show up when you don’t use the cartoonish XP or Vista interface and have Windows desktop set to the Classic or Custom theme.

I will be sending out a general announcement to everyone on my mailing lists when these two updates are ready.

When I first heard about Wat Thamkrabok, my life had reached a desperate state. An alcohol addition had almost destroyed me, and I wasn’t sure how much longer I had to live. My liver was in bad shape because of my alcoholism, and I had ignored a doctor’s instructions, a few years previously, to see a consultant. I now feared that it was beyond repair. I had been an alcoholic for almost two decades and my life felt completely miserable and pointless; the sort of life I wouldn’t wish a dog.

I found Wat Thamkrabok on the Internet. In the past I had tried many treatment options, but none of them had worked for me; I always ended up back drinking. I had lived in Thailand for a few years by this stage so it came as a surprise to find that such a treatment facility existed right under my nose. The information on the Internet provided something that had been missing in my life for years; it gave me hope. The regime at the temple sounded harsh, but the time for pussy-footing around had passed. I felt willing to do anything if it meant an escape from the misery that my life had become. Alcoholism was about to kill me anyway so what did I have to lose? I was only thrity-six and didn’t want to die.

On my first day at the temple, I met a wonderful monk called Phra Hans who answered all the questions that had bugged me for years about my addiction to alcohol. He explained that I had been using alcoholism as a tool to cope with life. Maybe this tool had worked for a short while, but it was now counter-productive. This Swiss monk explained to me that my reason for choosing alcohol as a means to cope with the pain in life was that I had lost my path in life. If I once again found my way in life, then the need for alcohol would fall away. He went on to explain that there was no way that this path would become clear to me while I was still abusing alcohol or any drug.

I spent ten days at Wat Thamkrabok and at times it was harder then even I had imagined. The temple is famous for its use of an anti-emetic to speed the detox process along. For the first five days at the temple, we were expected to take this medicine and spend the next ten minutes vomiting up pints of water into a gutter. This humbling ceremony took place in front of a large crowd of other patients and supporters. It is a difficult process, but also a magical one. Most impressively, it did indeed speed the detox process along.

Wat Thamkrabok is a Buddhist temple but there is no attempt to convert anyone to any religion. Most of the monks are ex-addicts themselves so really know what they are talking about. The temple does not charge money for its work with alcoholics and addicts, which is pretty amazing when you compare it to the big money-making business that addiction treatment sometimes seems to have become in western countries. Not to take away from the good work that many of these treatment centres do.

On my first day at the temple, the Swiss monk warned me that Wat Thamkrabok could not cure me. It would still be up to me to do the work. What the temple did provide were great tools which would give me a chance at staying sober and living a happy life. I left the temple feeling completely cured of my addiction and so will always be grateful to it and believe it to be a magical place. I appreciate, though, that there are many options which work to lead addicts and alcoholics into recovery. It would not be practical for everyone to turn up in Thailand in the hope of beating their addiction; many would go home disappointed.

About the Author:

Paul Garrigan was born in Ireland, spent his twenties in England, and now lives in Thailand. Most of the year, he works as an ESL teacher, but he’s also a qualified nurse. He has one book published and another one due for release in 2010.

Homeowners, though, get a little upset when termites start eating the wooden poles of their house. I lived in Australia for 10 years, and it was necessary to spray around the house annually. Also, when the house was built, screening was laid around the foundation and around the entrance holes for the various water and sewage pipes.

Some people in Australia build houses with a metal frame, rather than wood, just to reduce the chance of termite damage. However, it was reported that one home was damaged anyway because the owner did not spray around his house (hey, it’s got a metal frame, why bother?) and the termites got inside by building a mud tunnel up the concrete foundation until they found a hole into the house, then they ate a path through the drywall (which has a paper coating). Paper is made from wood pulp, in other words, it’s termite food.

Information on controlling termites can be found here:
http://www.Termite-Control.info

I Love Thailand and Will Probably Live Here for the Rest of My Life, but It’s Not Perfect

I have lived in Thailand for almost five years and I do love it. However, if you plan on coming to live in Thailand, do remember there are still disadvantages to living in Thailand especially for Westerners. Thailand is an exotic country, it’s hot, it’s frustrating sometimes and Thais do think differently than Westerners. Having lived here for almost five years, here are my top five frustrations with living in Thailand.

1. The Heat. A huge disadvantage about living in Thailand is the weather. The Thais joke they have three seasons – Hot, Hotter and Hottest. It’s always hot here. Of course, Thailand has a ‘winter’ but, in Bangkok, it normally lasts for about three days and the heat only falls to a temperature of around 85 degrees. It’s still hot. So, even though many of the Thais are wearing down jackets and sweaters (seriously!), most Westerners will still find it uncomfortable, sweaty and hot. According to the World Metereological Organization, Bangkok is the world’s hottest city, so when a Thai tells you they have a winter, don’t believe them.

2. The Traffic. The traffic in many Thai cities, but especially in Bangkok, is appalling, and this is probably the biggest disadvantage of living in Thailand for most Westerners. Traffic jams are a daily occurrence and, despite the Thai government saying they are trying to solve the problem, they seem to get worse every year. If I leave my house to go to work at 6am, it takes me less than 15 minutes to get there. If I leave my house at 7:15am, my commute to work now takes 2 hours. The one main street I travel to work on will simply be one huge traffic jam, which barely moves. Bangkok is also gridlocked on every street and every major freeway. Many Thais spend hours every day just sitting in traffic jams. This is also why they will normally organize meetings between 10am and 2pm. It’s the only time the traffic isn’t horrendous.

3. The Pollution. Bangkok pollution is really bad. It hangs in a gray pall all over the city and never really dissipates. For the first few months I was here, it always seemed difficult to breathe and was a huge disadvantage to my well being. Unfortunately, you do get used to the Bangkok pollution, and now I barely even notice it. My lungs probably do though.

4. Conversation. Most Thais do not speak very much English so conversation is difficult. I work in an office with all Thai employees, (I am the only Westerner), so that can sometimes be a little frustrating when I long for a ‘Western conversation’. However, Thais are so nice and friendly, this fact does make up for the lack of Westerners at work.

5. Obtaining Visas and Work Permits. This can be frustrating in Thailand as the rules change all the time. I teach here and all teachers now have to have university degrees and TEFL (Teaching English as a Foreign Language) certification, as well as at least 2 years teaching experience. Without this, you cannot get a work permit in Thailand and, even with these qualifications, it requires many trips to immigration before you are completely legal.

Overall, living in Thailand is really wonderful and I do plan on staying here permanently. The above five disadvantages are very frustrating at times, but the advantages so far outweigh the disadvantages, most of the time they are nothing more than a minor nuisance.

PHUKET CITY: The director general of the Land Department has reiterated that foreigners using Thai nominees to buy land anywhere in the country will have their land title deeds revoked if caught – even if the nominee in question is a lawfully wedded spouse.

Land Department Director Anuwat Meteewiboonwut made the comments during a recent stop in Phuket as part of a nationwide inspection tour of 30 provinces.

The tour is aimed at improving public services by land officials in three areas: dress, conduct when dealing with the public and working harder to eliminate a backlog of work.

Many members of the public have complained that it takes up to a year to complete a transaction that should only take one day, he said.

Mr Anuwat, a former governor of both Phang Nga and Samut Prakan provinces, said he was satisfied on the first two points, but rated the general level of success among land officials nationwide at speeding up their work rate at “only 30%”.

The next round of inspection tours will come in July, after which time personnel changes will be considered if service does not improve, he said.

“We have to keep pressure on them, otherwise the work will not get done,” he said.

As for foreigners seeking to buy homes in Phuket, they can do so through the Condominium Act, which allows foreign ownership of up to 49% of any project, he said.

Foreigners cannot use a Thai spouse as a nominee to buy property in Thailand, however.

“If the Thai spouse has enough money to buy the house that is fine, but if the Thai has no money and uses money given to him or her by a foreigner to acquire property, that is against the law. If we check and find out later that a Thai person has been using money from a foreigner to buy land anywhere in Thailand, we will revoke title deeds,” he said.

Mr Anuwat said the provisions of [Ministry of Interior] ministerial order 43 makes it difficult to issue land documents quickly, as it requires action from a number of different agencies. Desire for land on the island has also led to encroachment problems here, he said.

As a key market for property companies, Phuket is a constant source of problems and complaints to the director general’s office, he admitted.

“We will try to resolve these problems and develop our personnel continuously in order to provide high quality services. Fortunately the governor of Phuket used to work in the Land Department, so he understands the procedures and can help co-ordinate all the agencies involved,” he said.

Mr Anuwat was speaking of Phuket Governor Wichai Phraisa-ngop, who served as Land Office director in Nakhon Pathom in 1997 and as deputy director of the Land Department nationwide in 2003.

– Phuket Gazette 2009-05-27